What's with all the Ghosting?

Sure it happens, but don't let it get to you.

If you’ve spent any time in the world of fundraising, you’ve probably been there: you’ve crafted the perfect outreach message, made a compelling case for support, and perhaps even shared an inspiring story. You hit “send” on that carefully thought-out email or leave a heartfelt voicemail, and then… nothing. No response, no follow-up, no donation—just silence.

Like, Casper level silence. Or Slimer. Or (insert famous ghost here).

This wasn’t a bad cartoon, but look at Slimer. I mean, come on.

Getting ghosted by prospective donors is an all-too-common experience for fundraisers. It can be frustrating, demoralizing, and can sometimes feel personal. But here’s the truth: being ghosted is simply a part of the fundraising process, and it happens to everyone. The key is to not let it bleed into other areas of your work or, worse, affect your confidence and effectiveness as a fundraiser.

Why Do Prospective Donors Ghost?

First, let’s normalize this experience by understanding why ghosting happens in the first place. Here are some common reasons:

1. Timing Isn’t Right: Your prospect may have the desire to give but might not be in a position to do so at the moment. Financial constraints, competing priorities, or even just a busy season can delay their decision.

2. Lack of Connection: Even the best-crafted appeal won’t resonate with everyone. Sometimes, the prospective donor doesn’t feel the same connection to your cause that you do, and they may not know how to express that.

3. Information Overload: Donors are bombarded with requests from various organizations. It’s easy for your outreach to get lost in the noise, especially during peak giving seasons.

4. Decision Fatigue: People have limited mental bandwidth, and making decisions—especially about money—can be exhausting. It’s not that they don’t care; they’re just too tired to act.

It’s Not You, It’s Them

The important thing to remember is that being ghosted isn’t a reflection of you or your worth as a fundraiser. It’s simply a reality of the work. Prospective donors are human, and their actions (or inactions) are rarely about you.

But There’s a Line to Draw

While ghosting by donors is something you can’t control, it’s crucial to set boundaries on how much this behavior impacts you emotionally and professionally. Here's how to keep it from seeping into other areas of your work:

1. Maintain Professionalism: Keep your responses consistent, warm, and professional. Being ghosted doesn’t mean you should stop reaching out or change your tone. Maintain your level of service and commitment because you never know when a prospect might circle back.

2. Avoid Emotional Drain: It’s easy to take ghosting personally, but it’s essential to protect your emotional energy. Focus on what you can control—your follow-up strategy, the quality of your outreach, and your relationships with those who do engage.

3. Don’t Let It Dictate Your Worth: One “no” or silence from a prospect doesn’t diminish your value or the impact of your work. Celebrate your wins, both big and small, and keep moving forward with your goals.

4. Keep the Pipeline Flowing: If you focus too much on one prospect, it’s easy to lose sight of the bigger picture. Keep your prospect pipeline flowing by continuously cultivating new leads, so you’re not overly dependent on any single donor’s response.

5. Reframe Rejection as Redirection: Every no—or non-response—gets you closer to a yes. It’s an opportunity to refine your pitch, adjust your strategy, and approach the next prospect with even more insight.

Focus on What Matters

Fundraising is about building relationships over time, not just securing immediate gifts. It’s perfectly okay if not every interaction results in a donation. Your job is to plant seeds, nurture relationships, and keep showing up with unwavering passion for your cause. This basic idea is why I named my firm, "Rootstock Philanthropy”.

Remember, getting ghosted is a fact of life in fundraising. But it doesn’t define you, and it shouldn’t dictate the quality of your work or your attitude toward it. Keep your eyes on the bigger picture, learn from every interaction—successful or not—and know that every no is just a step closer to your next yes.

But what about other kinds of ghosting? Well, that happens too.

But in any client business, it’s Never OK to Ghost.

Ghosting a client—suddenly disappearing without communication—can be highly damaging to your professional reputation. When you fail to respond or abruptly stop engaging with a client, it signals a lack of respect for their time and needs. Clients rely on consistent communication to feel secure in the partnership, and when you go silent, it disrupts their expectations and erodes trust. This lack of communication can leave them feeling undervalued and abandoned, damaging the relationship and your reputation in the industry. The professional world is small, and word of poor service spreads quickly, potentially leading to lost opportunities and future business.